Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

The chip is hot, we all know that. This is a review of the aftermath that changed my life: I woke up at 200 this morning, I had this strange paid deep inside my stomach. For a few moments I didn't think it was anything to concern myself with; I was looking at my phone to keep myself distracted, but then I heard what I can only describe as a satanic sound coming from deep inside my soul, okay no worries... (hopefully) so I took a trip to the bathroom, I thought it was going to be mostly routine,,, it was anything but. Satans Dragon was in me... and he was mad... he tore through my body with an ancient anger that brought tears to my eyes. As an avid atheist I found religion and I prayed... I prayed for death because it would be a sweet relief from the fire that was tearing its way out of my body with a hate so old it can not even be put into words, it was just a vicious action that was destroying me from the inside out. Minion (my cat) came in to check on me, but the toxic fumes of acid emitting from my inner core were too much to bare. All I could do was lay on the floor naked begging for the sweet release. Then, it was over... or I thought it was, I don't remember round two because I blacked out and made a mess in my girlfriends bathroom, at this point I have been abandoned, by Minion, my dignity, my self respect, and my body. Now I write this message as a ghost of my former self. Stay away from Satans chip.