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Quote: "Dead on arrival, could not resuscitate. I expect more from Dewalt." Ummm. My bad. The issue was both of my Dewalt chargers were shutting down before they transferred any juice to the cells, so I assumed the battery was at fault. Both had charged my 2Ah battery just fine. What didn't occur to me until a few minutes ago is that I'd plugged the chargers into a power strip with a rather limited ability to supply current to the hefty 5Ah battery. I tried again with a charger plugged directly into the outlet and the battery is charging just fine. So 100% user error. I'm nearly sure the tiny print in the instructions says something about this...