Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

I received this as a gift from the compassionate emergency room staff after approximately 3 trips to their fine establishment. Apparently "everyone" has lights at the top of their stairs and no one stores Lego's at the bottom. While I find that very hard to believe, I capitulated and graciously assembled this lamp. It seemed to mock me from the moment I began to read the instructions but it went together very easily. Yet still, there was an odd feeling in the hall at the top of the stairs that only moving the lamp near the door would abate. So I did. The next morning I headed to work and actually thought about what a fun lamp I was gifted. Okay, this is weird but I actually wanted to go home early a few times just to see the lamp and figure out why it caused feelings. Alas, I waited out the clock and punched my time card. Catching the bus home was fun and I talked about the lamp to a stranger. I even showed her a photo of it. We laughed and laughed. So I'm walking from the bus stop, start up my walk whistling and then I hear voices inside the my house. Must have left the TV on I said out loud to myself. The voices stilled. As I just slightly opened the door I detected a faint smell of perfume, now this was really odd. Opening further, the wall of perfume overwhelmed me so much so I didn't immediately see the other lamps in the room. Then the complete picture unfolded, my gift lamp is a pimp. It seems I left it too near the door and unbeknownst to me this lamp can actually manipulate door hardware.