Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Background: I had a Nike Fuel for a while, RIP - I miss you so much. But after an extended mourning period, I decided I needed a new fitness watch. Sadly they all look hideous, children cried at the sight of them. Fast forward a year, and I noticed a friend's Fitbit. Looked pretty great AND had a heartrate monitor. SO COOL! And then I looked at the price, and my feelz filled up with sadz. As I glumly scrolled down the Amazon page, I looked at Related Products to cheer me up - AND LO! WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE! It looks like THE SAME THING for ~$35!!! I nearly turned into pure joy at that moment. And so our journey begins. Watch got here in a day, I fastened it on my wrist and marveled at how good it looks. Not obnoxious, huge, fruity, or generally hideous. It looked good, I look good, we were both looking pretty fine. After a few minutes of unsuccessfully fiddling with it, I broke down and read the instructions. This happens with everything I own. The instructions were on the spartan side, but were enough to convince me to get the app. App put new firmware on the watch and everything synches up. Nice. I walk around the house, count my steps, check the watch - It too was counting my steps! We had the same number - Great job, watch! I let it take my heart rate - This is endlessly amusing for me. I did this for 20 minutes, becaue my thinker feels this is fun. I have no idea what my heart rate actually is, but the numbers seemed reasonable. It turns out the app tracked all this too! I have no idea what to do with this information, but I sure do like having it! Woo! It has an alarm - Handy. It'll never wake me up, but perhaps someone who doesn't sleep like a stone would notice. It's handy when I'm awake. It also lets me know when I get a call or a message, just like my phone. Redundant, but still enjoy that. It also tells me how many calories I burned. Since I have absolutely no way of verifying this ( I was publicly educated, you see), I'm going to give the watch the benefit of the doubt, and call the number legit. The last item was the sleep tracker. I've never tracked my sleep, nor wanted to, but now I am intrigued! How do you turn it on? How does it know? NO ONE KNOWS! I wake up this morning and I thought my sleep went untracked like every other day in my entire life. Synched up the watch - HOLEY COW! I HAVE A DETAILED GRAPH ABOUT WHEN I WAS UNCONSCIOUS! I have no idea what to do with this information, but it is SO COOL! The battery lasts a solid couple of days, which is fine with me. The app draws a bit more battery from the phone, I assume because of the bluetooth. Nothing to onerous, just a couple more percent. Displays in military time, and I operate in military time, so that was AOK (suck it, AM & PM). Also the app let me change from kilometers (Get out of here with your superior measuring system, hippies!) to good ol' miles. The band holds well and is comfy. THE BEST PART (besides not paying $150 for a Fitbit, Polaris or Garmin) - I look at my pathetic amount of steps in the app. The self loathing sets in. I've been a sad, lethargic slob. Bask in the self-hate that fires up my motivation like a dynamo. I know I need to shed a couple pounds and get that cardio in, and I can fool myself (I'm sure I walked/ran enough today, yeah... Sure did...) - But I can't fool the watch and the app. They know. They are judging me, I can feel it. I'll show BOTH of you - Time to hit the pavement.