Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

1. As if it were a TV show: It's "House" meets the "Sopranos." 2. In historical context: It's the best comic crime fiction debut since Robert Crais's "The Monkey's Raincoat." 3. Through a mourning veil for David Foster Wallace: Greatest footnotes since he died. 4. If you are one of those who only read nonfiction: It will teach you cool stuff about medicine, the Mafia and Auschwitz. 5. In case you like dramatic irony: The violence in it is clinical, the clinical sloppy and vile. 6. As if it were on Facebook: Its friends would be Jonathan Lethem's "Motherless in Brooklyn" and Richard Dooling's "Critical Care," but it would be the funny, outgoing one. 7. On a personal note: It is only the fourth book in my adult life I stayed awake to finish once starting it that night. 8. As if it had already been made into a movie: The book is better. 9. As a bar mitzvah present: Coolest ever. 10. As if flipping through its pages randomly: Did you notice fat men have diagonal creases in their nipples? Who does Michael Corleone imitate when he drops the gun after he shoots the cop? How about an exquisite description of the Hudson in midwinter? There's at least one of these on every page. 11. If you were to judge it by its cover: Don't. It's not Dean Koontz. 12. As an investment; Get the first edition. 13. As if it were the first of many: Please.