Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Some well-meaning Christian friends gave my husband and me this book after we were newly married. When we read it, we were appalled. The whole focus of the book is that you need to meet your partner's needs, and if you don't, they're likely to have an affair. As a Christian, I have a few problems with that premise, the first being that it is based on my needs and not on sacrifice. But I can see how, in the hands of someone wise, that message could be at least somewhat conformed more to godly principles. But some of the "needs" are dreadful. For example, it is apparently a man's need to have an attractive spouse so that he will be admired by his friends and colleagues. She needs to keep herself up, and if a little plastic surgery is called for, so be it. I completely understand this from a worldly perspective, but from a Christian one? The need to be admired by one's friends and colleagues comes straight from pride and ego, not from a Christ-like walk. Another need, this time from the female perspective: a woman apparently needs to feel financially secure. If her husband doesn't make enough money, then she's going to find someone who will. Again, where's the Christian worldview in this? Possibly the worst part of the whole book is in the questionnaires in the back of the book, where the husband is to rate how well his wife is meeting all of his needs, and the wife is to rate her husband. The whole problem with this book is summed up in this destructive questionnaire. Are you meeting my needs, honey, even when they're not godly? Well, then. Don't blame me if I have an affair. There are so many other, far more helpful marriage books out there. This one is very much produced from the spirit of our age -- "it's all about my needs." Run, do not walk, away from this book. I'd give it zero stars if I could.