Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

There are so many problems with this book- how to begin this review? To say "Hopeless sucks *ss" might be most appropriate, considering the number of times that phrase is repeated in the first few chapters. Examples: "cafeteria food sucks *ss", "your spaghetti sucks *ss", and "school sucked *ss." Really? As the story progresses, the reader is pummeled with superlatives. (In case you didn't pay attention in English 101 a superlative is "the highest degree of comparison, excessive or exaggerated"). On pages 60-61 alone we find: completely out of breath, complete silence, entire way, no one ever, totally fall for it, he has no idea, I've never run, it's taking everything...need I continue? A few pages later we come across "absolutely, positively hate." There are so many adverbs they totally, completely, and absolutely distract from the story. Minimal text is dedicated to the development of the characters. The names are ridiculous- Sky, Six, Breckin, and Holder? *eyes roll*. Sky's best friend's name was originally Seven, but she changed it to Six just to be uncooperative. The characters are cliched, but at least Hoover got to check all the politically correct and tolerant boxes. Breckin is gay, paints his nails black, and wears pink. That's the extent of his character development. Oh, and the fact that he uses the word "Mormon" as a euphemism for gay. What? I guess it's supposed to be clever. Sky's mother is another caricature- a vegan who eschews technology in any form (at least that figures into the plot later). I understand that the language is supposed to be representative of a typical teenager, but it just doesn't work. It sounds more like a roomful of 12 year old boys trying to outdo one another with profanity and tough talk. Other examples of stupidity include "cop a feel", "I kicked his drunk *ss out", "I'll cut a b*tch", and probably the most ridiculous- "milk that tastes like *ss". Does anyone talk like this? A small part of the romance writing has potential. It would be nice, girls, if there were a boy out there who would be so obsessed with you- just you- but there's not. However, most of the romantic writing is just insipid. When a couple kisses, one of them says, "It's game on." On page 170 Sky says, "It feels like the entire earth has shifted off its axis, and Holder is the core" and Holder "crashes his lips to mine" (crashes? perhaps the intended word was crushes?) and "We have just wholly fallen into each other." I can see why the FEELINGS in the book would appeal to many teenage girls- and I suppose that accounts for the many 5 star reviews. Stirring raging hormones should not be an acceptable substitute for quality writing. Hoover needed help with forming the past participle of "run." Examples: "He's already ran 4 miles" (p. 78), "I've ran no less than 4 miles" (p. 137), and "faster than I've ever ran" (p. 195). A similar past participle problem appeared on page 234 with "We wouldn't have came here together today." How does an editor miss glaring grammar gaffes like these? Writing must be clear and correct so that it does not interfere with the story. Finally, who is the intended audience for this book? The language is juvenile, but the subject matter is not. The problem resolution (which I won't go into to avoid spoilers) was rapid, unrealistic and again, just stupid. I'm tired of thinking about this book, much less writing about it. There are finer books waiting to be read. The idea of a Holder (minus his obvious faults) to cherish you is appealing, girls, but his presentation in this poorly written piece of pulp fiction is not worth your time.