Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Full disclosure--I have never left a review on Amazon before. But I felt compelled to after reading this monstrosity--I returned it via Kindle after only 5%. I read the trilogy in its (purple prose) entirety because I wanted to see what happened. I even saw the movie--which did the book far more justice than the author deserved. The bit I read went like this: Ana: I'm here to interview you for the paper (blushes). Christian: (wonder if she blushes all over with my cane): Yes? Ana: Because I have thoughts? Christian: (Oh, baby, I'm having thoughts too. With you bent over on my spanking bench.) What thoughts are those? (Mine involve chafing rope.) And on. Like that until 5% when I simply couldn't take it anymore. And wanted my money back. Don't waste your money or time. I read a lot of things--some are great--some are not-so-good. This was simply an abomination.