Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

I bought this book before we moved to France in 2004. The only edition I could find was the 2nd one. Granted, the new 3rd edition has come out, which I hope contains some corrections, but in the 2nd edition (written in the late 1990s) lists Mitterand as the President (still!) and Jaques Chirac as the Mayor of Paris. Considering this had changed several years before the 2nd edition came out, it made me question what other outdated information was in the book. When I first read through the book, I thought it was excellent. I honestly thought it was going to prepare me for life in Paris. It certainly freaked me out completely, and I thought for sure we were going to be completely lost in this "proper" world with rallyes, snobby dinner parties, and having to forge close relationships with the cashiers at our local grocery store. Our son attends Maternelle, which is where Polly Platt says a "rigorous and demanding" education begins. Not true!! I was actually afraid to send him to a school where teachers would talk down to him and force him to sit still for hours. Instead, his teacher is the sweetest woman, and the children spend their days painting, learning songs, reading, and playing. . .much like an American pre-school. In addition, whenever my son says "Bonjour Madame" to a woman in the store or on the street, they are always surprised, and quick to praise both of us. It is not something that is common, and children at the age of 2 (unlike stated in the book) do not usually do this. After living in France for two years, I picked this book back up, and was frustrated with the poor advice. Polly Platt truly envisions herself as part of the upper crust of Parisian society, and most of her advice is ridiculous, at best. I was teaching English at a local school, and tried to use the phrases Polly Platt has scattered around her book, such as "mal élevé" and "bien élevé." I was greeted with blank stares from my students who understood the words, but didn't quite grasp the concept. It wasn't an automatic given, as Ms. Platt likes to make it seem. Furthermore, on the playground, children come up to my son (a "stranger") and ask to play with him all the time -- something Ms. Platt claims will never happen due to the French pressures to be "bien élevé" I gave the book two stars, because some of the advice is true. The French do have to be handled carefully, but most of this is common sense. Many Americans do not travel frequently, but one of the first international destinations on everyone's list is Paris. It can be disorienting to a traveler to come into a new culture, and I think this is why a lot of the misunderstandings occur. The rules aren't the same, but they are in no way as strict as is made out in "French or Foe." Nor should travelers be in the habit of rudely demanding anything from anyone, no matter where they go. I would say to the majority of people, this is common sense. I have never shaken hands with a French person, unless I was the one who initiated it. Even in places of business, you will find people doing "la bise." One (French) friend of mine even took to feigning constant colds to get out of doing "la bise" with one of her co-workers who she didn't like all that much. I'm sure there are many situations where this is not appropriate, but it is very doubtful the average American coming to Paris will be shaking hands with the French all day long. As other reviewers have already mentioned, the French make mistakes in their own language. Much like English has evolved, French is evolving. It is not spoken perfectly an precisely, especially by the younger generations. Dropping the "ne" in a negative sentance is quite common, turning "Ce n'est pas" into "C'est pas." Their language is protected with pride, but not quite as fiercly as Ms. Platt likes to claim. All in all (because this review is now a monster), it's an okay book if you want a little overview of French culture, as well as some of the differences you might encounter here. However, take every piece of advice with a grain of salt, and remember that the majority of what is written on the pages of "French or Foe" will not be applicable to you.