Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Females across the world have long suffered through the painful use of dull, manly pens. Finally, it seemed as if BIC developed a writing utensil perfect for women! However, this pen is lacking in several areas. First, it isn't quite sparkly enough. I expect any pen designed for women to positively ooze glitter at all times. Like a Ke$ha concert. Secondly, where are the rainbows? How can a company possibly market a product to women without including rainbows? And lastly, shouldn't these pens also double as make-up? I mean, obviously us women-folk need a pen that we can also use as eyeliner, lipgloss, or nail polish!