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Something Wicked This Way Hops
Here we go again--the Left's favorite flank attack in the War on Christmas: the Easter Bunny. Secular-progressives love to roll out this cottontail Trojan Horse, tempting children from the true meaning of Easter with a cheap chocolate handout. This animistic perversion of the Resurrection story shows the Left's total ignorance of science. Rabbits don't lay eggs--they're MAMMALS! If you ever see a rabbit lay chocolate, for God's sake don't eat it--that's how you get Giardia. BTW, where in the Bible does it say anything about a rabbit? Nowhere. Rabbits are notorious hedonists, shacked up in communal "warrens," hooked on grass, fornicating like--well, like I don't know what. From cross-dressing libertine Bugs Bunny, constantly subverting Elmer Fudd's Second Amendment rights, to Roger Rabbit, who claimed to have been framed (don't they all?), these long-eared liberals keep nibbling away at our freedom. But every year, my neighbors' kids fall for it, scouring their lawns for supposed rabbit eggs--laid, in fact, by their own parents--all in the name of "fun". It's not fun--it's a Godless mockery. What's it going to take to wake people up? The Four Peeps of the Apocalypse? Do what I do. Every April I march my children into to a cave, roll a boulder in front of it, and give them three days to try to get out. They come away confused, dehydrated, and a good deal closer to God. *** Have a Happy Easter, everyone!
April 2014 · Grocery and Gourmet Food
the product in question
Funny Bunny Wind-up Jelly Bean Pooping Easter Bunny Candy Dispenser (Colors Vary)
3.8★ · 204 ratings, as of 2023
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